reason to shew that and tho many times these temtations did not drive to despare because I hoped to be satisfied of thee. yet much [dullnes] of devotion I thought it [necessary] and considering I should be so [wise?] thus, to dout of thee, but I was comforted by the prophet Daved in the 116 psal I said [in?] my hast all men are liers yet the [illeg] after he was [raised] and said what shall I give unto there is a God before whose judgment we must come. as also there is a reward for the good which the heathen philosefers\sophers/ could foretell. tho the had but the light of nature. it is said in the 58 psalme verily there is a reward for the righteous. doutlesse there is a God that judgeth in the earth. if I goe within the dores of my owne flesh. I find thy providence wonderfull towards me that even at the very same time of the pitts brinke of despare thou shouldest comfort for I have found thine owne words accordiing to truth fit for me, yea and if I call to mind many yeres a goe thought and so forwards former times I have found the experiance of thy goodnesse toward me by mine inla\r/gments in praire and successe thereafter (and when I said /I thought\ I am cast out of thy sight yet most times. and when thou didest not or delaiest yet I found it to be best for me. thou hardest the voice of my prair when I cried to thee. as also thou hast granted \me/ mine owne harts desire. and hast not denied the request of my lips. \psa 25. psa 30.22/ also there is none that "requirest truth etc --- psa [52] "requiereth that purity as thy selfe doth for thou regardest truth in the inward parts and lovest the the Lord for all his benefits to me and holines as it is written Be yee holy. for I am holy. I Pet 1.16 pure in heart. and unlesse I had laboured against many impure temtations. that I might be pure as to still labour to be thine. in whom is secure hapinesse and happie security, and without whom there is none: (I finding my selfe without thee ready to fall into danger and mischefe) There is none holy as the Lord. for there is none besides thee. neither is there of any might besides me (saith God) is no saviour Isa like our God \I Sam 2.2/ What neede I dout of thee my God. seeing thou hast granted me that saving knowledge where is S Austin saith he found it not in the book of the platonests which was much esteemed of B 7. C 2[1]. ⁸⁹ it is not for no purpose. tis no idle toy. that so eminent a heigth of authority. which the Christian faith hath is diffused all the world over: Aust B6 c11. ⁹⁰ c5 S Aust could nowhere else find these words ⁹¹ no where else to be found. for there is no booke of human learing like unto thy word \in thy Booke/ both for delight and truth and frutfullnes of profit thy word is (saith David) tried to the uttermost. and thy servant loveth it \[psal 119]/ since the beginning of the world they have not heard nor understood with the eare. neither hath the eye seene another God besides thee. and which doth so to him that waiteth for thee \Isa 64.4/ yea Lord let me trust in thee. for of thee commeth my salvation. thou art my* \[illeg]/ strength and my salvation. and my defence. therefore I shall not much be moved. psal 62.1 among the Gods there is none like unto thee for thou art great and doest wonderous things. Mr king speaking of this [86] psa in his [16] lecture is well worth the reading. Also the knowledge of the contrarietes in nature are so desposed by the divers providence that they make one [di]ule sweet harmony to the praise of God the [Auther] thereof thou art God alone \psa 86.10/ Lord there is none like thee neither is there any God besides thee. according* /to all \ we have heard with our eares. \chron 17.20/ yea ever where is thy power providence and goodnes. made manifest. O Lord God of hosts who is like unto thee. thy truth* most mighty Lord is on every side psa 89.9

I have read of some philosophers who would give a in Swans Booke of natureall philosophy . but Mr Dike saith in his 6 [evangellat] histories that the place on the 3 of John and the [8] verse naturall reason for everything but could not tell from whence the winde should come (or what should be the cause of it)⁹³ according to our saviour saying John 3.8 The winde bloweth where it listeth. and thou hearest the sound thereof. but canst not tell whence it commeth. and The philosophers seeme to know whence the wind comes. but they vary among themselvs about the originall. and the most that can be said is but [pro]bable. as also the know not the ebing and flowing of the sea whether it goeth : so is every man that is borne of the spirit. for the naturall man can give no reason of those conflicts in a Christians soule. because he per-ceiveth not the things of the Spirit of God. they being Spiritually descerned \I cor 2.14/ and not onely at the same instance of misery (when all other meanes faile) thou comfortest or helpest as thou pleasest. but also thou desposest our mindes to serve thee more at some times then at others. so that it is not in our* owne powers to doe what or when wee would likewise I have admired the memory. as a marvelous worke of thine. that I should utterly forget those things which at another time have come freshly to me. besides for the multiplicity a thing O my God to be amazed at having in us astwere an besides the beauty of vales and mountaines have stired me up to praise thee everlasting libreary then soe he that formeth the mountaines, and createth the wind. and declareth unto man what is his thought. the Lord of hostes is his heretofore I much [paid wed] to understand the [variety] of God by these places Daniel [?] 10.11. John. 9.30.32 [therebe] divers places to confirme this in [Isa] as in the [xvv 21] Name, \Amos 4.13/ besides these temtations I feelt my owne sinnes so [inviourne] me that I knew not how to get out for heretofore when I had resisted those temtations of Blasfemie \and weaknes/ yet then I should \[worry and]/ tempt thee for some signe of thy favor or deliverance, as somtimes of late and to dout of thy goodnes towards me but thou hast delivered me out of these snares as somtimes I thought \other/ of the parish who would have us dout or not that any should be in sertainty of /there\* salvation But herein I satisfie my selfe with the Prophet David \psal [73.24]/ Thou wilt guide me with thy counsell and after-ward receive me to glory. and to* this time. I found my olde sinnes to take much hold on me. for in these yeres not only the temtations of Satan troubled me, but also there slided into me the [alur]ments of the world. and I found those sinnes which my owne flesh were prone to. for I had evill thoughts which were not lawfull (besides the devell temping me to filthy thoughts which were not desent) and I had vaine thoughts which were not or did good to others in hope of some gayne. but these [man]y times I tooke holde of the saying lord incline my hart to thy law and not to coveteousnes. psa 119.36 expedient. for tho I esteemed not the world very much. yet somtimes I had coveteous thoughts for tho my cheefest care was to serve thee for thy selfe yet somtimes I hoped for a worldly rewarde for things to please to please my owne sensuall delight or fancy and to satisfie my pride and ambition. as also envious thoughts thinking much that others should fayr better or as well as my selfe. and not being so glad as I might be for the good of others as for my selfe. But the most that possest me was also somtimes I have bine with the praises of some (taken with [my] vertue and otherwise have commened me. but I stayed my selfe with thinking of the [vainesses] of people praise by [writting] this, what is [often etc] vaine thoughts or of vaine things and selfe conceit. which because they are breed in nature and \or/ agreable to it seeme not to be so odious but more pleasent. these tho they be good at no time yet I found them the worse because they many times interrupted me in good duties. and though I was by degrees some what mended yet I found these harder wholy