Now I atained to doe not onely the shape of without teaching or being learnt insencable things. but also to imitate the life of nature in a more divine way. being much taken with those and withall I had a mind to [paint?] the picturs of some frinds whom I loved figurs in which the Soules are resident. and acte there severall functions, according as the mind is desposed. There being three degrees of beauty as figure, forme, and life. or action any one of these are good. but a good aire or life. I have thought to be the best of them. and life being most expressed by the eye solomon saith he that hath a good eye shall be blesse[d] pro 22.9 the contrary of a wicked eye pro 28.22 because it cometh expresly from the soule when the mind is set upon good by thee which art the fountaine of life and goodnes. And I thought there was no true beauty which did not foreshow some vertue in it: for I observed some whose figure and forme where not to be disliked. yet I thought a certaine emtinesse there was the perfection of life and beauty appeared in our saviour who was both God and man psa 45.2 and I suppose non by pictures can make his outward appearance so well as it was without that life. which doth Spring from a heart replenished with good thoughts. further from beauty I thought those whose ayre or life doth Spring from bad thoughts. though they had both forme and figure. also I have found that there is a certaine agreement or uniforme which with also my sister told me she had read that by the divine influence of our Savour the desiples James and John followed him Matt 4.21 a good life is pleasing though the figer and form be but indiferent and that somtimes the vigour of the Spirits freashly apeareth in the countenance even in old age ( eye or countinancefrom the mind) which doth signifie the immortallity of the soule. but whether a good body and though it be unpossible to expresse the true life of motion in worke or pain[t] yet I tooke great delight in doeing the shadow of vertue which is one good set for the present though the other be farr more musicall. I did a picture of Charity or not honest be alwaies to be knowne by outward appearance I am not able to judge seeing ill may* be masked with a good show. and that vessel which is not to honnor now. may be to honour hereafter. also I have knowen those whose harts have bene for the most part good and minds upright that somtimes through the directions of Spirit are not alwaies alike in there countenances. for thou hast created our Soules immortall for thy selfe. and wee cannot be quieted till wee may find repose in thy favour. which thou do\e/st somtimes more especially shew. and thy deare sonne. who as the psalmist saith was fairer then the Children of man. yet through the /his\ suffering of death had \45.2/ some are of opinion when the diety did /then\ sequester it selfe neither forme nor beauty that we should desire him. \Isa [5]3.2/ Lord vaile my hart unto thee and in all my Saint Austin praiseth thee because of those beautifull patterns which through [mens] soules are conveighed into there cunning hands which all descend from the Heaven which is above our soules. though wee [fech] not trou/bl\ thence the measure of use them and yet here wee may perceive we neede not goe farr to seake it But might preserve our strength onely for thee and not were \[we]/ but upon such tiring delicates Book 10. c35 dejections of Spirit be thou my comforter. for thy loving kindnesse is better then life it selfe. and thou art the health of my countenance. and my God. \psa 42.15/

In these times my sister would often tell me of things that were past. and what my mother said to her: telling /[when she told]\ her that she should die. and that she should be ruld by me. and be comforted for she knew I would be kind to her. I have wondered that she should thus foreknow it. for it was only of thy good-nesse my God which gave me power to be so. and not of my owne corrupt nature. also she would often tell me how ill she was when I was from her at London. and how she desired my father that I might come home \[and my father]/ but I praied her not to speake to me (so often) of her griefe and illnes which I was unwilling to here. then she said she would speake no more to me of it. but" I should have the best wishes which a poore Sister could give. | and I spoke to my father my Brother and sister might live here. for J he was alone and I thought it would be more lightsome for us. thanking me for my kindnesse to her which she would say she was un-able to requit often confessing she knew not how to doe but for me.* Now my Sister told me /after\. she thought one of us should die. but she wished /or hoped\ it should /[might]\ be her selfe. yea and thou Blessed Lord didest /best\ well for her. I supp\os/ing she would have bine worse without me. then I her. which I beleeve she considered, for if I had bine a the Twens my Neeses were Borne which we was very joyfull of my Sister told me she then thought she should die when she heard of two Borne. yet she was merry and pretty well she and I did pursworke little ill she would have come trembleing about me. | In this time my Sister and I opening our minds one to another I told her that I thought she and I had as much experience of affliction both in my mother and our selves as but few had." and it came into my mind not to let thy goodnesse and mercie towards my mother die in oblivion." also another time my sister telling me the speeches of divers conserning my selfe about Marriage. and I having "nether was there now any in the house that had knowen altogether so much "but that the rememberance might be profitable to me which now was hie time to call to mind reasonings within me whereby I was satisfied before thee (and as I thought I was able to defende my \[selfe?]/ cause) yet I tolde my Sister it may be I will /writ somwhat to\* leave my mind to my friends when I die. to give them satisfaction. which I thought I ought to \doe/ especially to my father. which otherwise I could not so well expresse. also I told my Sister (with griefe) I found much dullnes in my soule to good. yet somtimes thou fittest me with very good thoughts or reasonings. which likewise my Sister confessed she had which was a my S \ Judeth/ read to me Swans booke of natural philosify I preserved and did things with her and after made an end of the Booke I wrot lace wonderfull comfort to her. I should have bine too much cast downe with my dullnes to good. but that I call\ed/ to mind the porphet David (whom I suppose felt the same want which I did) when hee often said. psal 119Quicken me after thy loving kindnes