because ofBy
this afflictioon of my owne and my
Sister together.
being in Daniell I read in
the Maccabees also I read
of the warres of the [Jewes]
[especialy] in the first yeare of her [being ill]
wee had \the/ more accesse unto thee,
for it was of thee Lord who preparest our harts to pray
unto thee. and thine cares heard. \psal 10.17/ and though wee had somtimes
sorrow in our selves. yet thereby we feelt more perfit joy in thee which I
can well witnes because thy consolations was deare unto mee. as also she
confessed to me. and I outwardly perceived, when her
[fits](fit) was over. by
those casments of her soule wherein she seemed to mee a conquerour. Lord
let all those that put there trust in thee rejoyce. let them shout \[chere]/
for joy: because thou defendest them. Let them also that love thy Name be
joyfull in thee \psal [c.11]/ As I take it this time my
Brother let me read
[or write] another thing
a [mongst] the rest I [learnt] not to speak ill of the dead because it is
so much against charity they not being able to answere for there selves
[King James workes](KW1)
which I liked well of. both for devine and morall learning
and instruction. and since I thought of this where he writeth of reading the
scripture that where any thing is hard or intricate \that place/ to us wee
should rather imput it to our owne dullnes and imbecillity of understanding,
then thinke any ill or defect of that that which is
sence therefore when I
thought som places in the scriptures not to agree or hard to understand
I thought it was my owne ignorance. therefore I was not much [troubled]
because I hoped in thy good time to understand it better which thou hast
in good measure granted
absolutly good. and perfect.
according to this I have thought of S pauls saying let no man
presume to understand above that which is meete to understand but that he
understand according to sobeiety as God hath dealte to every [one] [the]
measure of faith. Rom 12.3 and since I have found S Austine words
wee may
not censure thy Bible notwithstanding somthing in it shines not out clearly
enough. for wee submit our understanding \we thinke/ unto that and hold
for certain that even that which is shut from our eyes. to be most rightly
and truly spoken
68
- againe Let me ever in thee O Lord take
part with them,
and in thee delight my selfe in them. that edifie themselvs with thy truth.
in the largenesse of a Charitable construction: yea let us have recourse
together unto the words of thy Booke. and
this I hoped for afore
[but] now I am better sattisfied
make search for thy meaning in them69,
S-Aust. B12. C24.
70
and I read as I take \it/ for these two yeres
following throughout
[the first Booke of Marters
](BM1)
which I found to be very
I wrot purleprofitable
to know. those primitife times of the spreding of Christianity.
and how free the Church was from any point of popery some
thus were they [stained]
with there owne workes and went a whoring with there owne [inventions]
psal [cill. 59]
hundered years after Christ.
so that at first it was like a good fielde till the enimie
sowed tares by those men of sinne. who out of there owne braines brought
foorth those idle fances
*
(they many times) one after another doing
and undoeing. what others did afore them but still growing worse and worse.
so that I may rightly say and sum up there own doings thou hast made man
righteous: but they have sought many inventions. Eccles. 7. [3.1] I thought
this Booke necesary to be betimes read of Christians. that they may know the
constancy of the faithfull (and what God hath wrot for them) and /that they
may\ be better able to defend themselves lest the enemy find them unarmed.
in these times I thought not the day wellspent. unlesse I read some part
of what I might inrich my mind. having a desire to doe like the Bee thinking
it time to
[as well as] profit my body
or selfe by worke which thou hast continually for the most part blessed me
with [hetherto?]
furnish my selfe
with that which I might afterwards feed upon. in these yeares I praise thee
for the freenesse of conversation wee had
together with a gentelwoman which waited on mee shee being much the better
for her Gramother a gentillwoman of excellent
conversation whom my
sister was
much pleased with she being helpefull to her and having better bre[ed]ing
then the rest of the maides who was much with her yet wee thought our selves
happy and I praised thee for most of them who was
*and those which could read would for the most part every
evening read a chapter before me beginning the Bible so reading thoughout
and
Mrs Alce used to read to me in
[the [practice] of piety](PP1)
before I [recieved
\it/] I used to examine my life by the commandements
good servants*
and which
wee were glad to make use of. to keepe us company and make us merry having
few besids who cam to us. as I read
[the Booke of
Marters
](BM1)
so Mrs Alce began
[the Chronicles of our kings](KC1)
. whose
devotion in those first times might put
us to shame they having lesse knowledge and more goodnesse then wee have.
and if /[when]\ wee read privately to our sel[ves] wee used to repete one to
another
as I take it in this spring I
thought myselfe somwhat [dull] and had a mind to change the place and goe
to
London
but my frinds thought it not so fit for me.
I made an end of a pare of gloves which [lev of] before I began
as wee sat at worke,
those things which wee could remember. that was
remarkable or might edifie. Now having done the\[ose]/ garden flowers which
was most pleasant to me following the life. I also coveted in these