Now my mothers Nabours and frindes which had knowen her Religious converstio\n/ in her life desierd to heare of the maner of her death. by my Aunt Isham and Mr Baxter. who confessed it did trouble him till after hee was satisfied likewise I often thought of it. till I lighted upon a place in Dubertus of the maner of deaths. where he saith to this porpose when one is imprisoned in a pit it is no matter whether that which taketh him out be of silke or or of hemp. I suppose the feare of the violence of death together with her affection taking on like a naturall mother. caused her to be unwilling to die: she being yet young of the age of 34 yeares for she said shall I be cut off thus. it is said in the 102 psal. take me not away in the mids of my dayes. yet what neede I be dismaied at her unwillingness to die seeing our Blessed Saviour as he was man feared death. I beleeve my mothers taking of many cordials so fortified her nature which made her have the greater combat with death for she would often say if she had bin a poore woman she had died long afore this. and though now she was unwilling to die yet a weeke or fortnig[ht] a fore her, death she uttered these words. God forgive me. I never thought of death (not I suppose as much as \now/ she wished she had. but els I believe she was alwaies prepared. for her life was still a refineing. and she had fought the good fight. also she then said in maner of confession. God forgive me my sinnes of omission and commishion and I have not wronged any. I veud that it was a great comfort to her. that she had no combat with sutch at the time of her death. I have oberved that as my Granmother . mother and sister those which have had trialls in there life time. have had peace at there death. Now I was passified by degrees consering my mothers death. calling to mind thy goodnes my God towards us in some said my S had a consumtion but liked not to heare it she was now troubled with vomiting and grew very leane of her body yet nature hope it selfe, sparing her so long with us considering those many ill fits which she had neare death. and now her soule being freed from the prison of her body, I thought my selfe at the more liberty. her sicknes being before a continuale grife to mee and now I [su]ppose I was the better able to bare it because I had overcome that dull desease of the greene sicknes before she died. which now growing upon my sister together with her greife made her much the worse for by degrees she grew so ill that I almost despared of life: but through thy mercy my God thou didest lend her longer to my further comfort. and her greater joy for her manifold afliction for I though\t/ it was the will of God and therefore I strove to pasifie my selfe, better here and in a better place: and though* I thought to bare my mothers death as well as I could yet she and I should weepe together thinking our selves very unket⁵⁷ without her as sheepe without a sheparde \and/ though my father was kind to us yet he could not chouse but be for the losse of so good a wife: which \he/ showed by those verses which he made, full of greife as he was for so good a wife and my Brother came my Brother for so kind a mother, and so our grife was the greater but that wee had somtimes comfort of my Aunt Ishams coming to us. and \so/ had my father of his Neighbours and frinds which sent to him concoring together,